Because i wasn’t cared for as a baby i find school difficult,lessons a lot harder and friendships harder to form. The first day back at school is always the hardest because I’m used to relaxing and talking non-stop, I find R.S the hardest because we have to learn about the things I don’t believe in. I don’t believe god looks after children otherwise i wouldn’t be writing this and had to experience what i did, It could have been worse but I’m still affected by it. I was abused for 2 years but not as bad as the other children who were there longer i feel really sorry for what they are experiencing it must be really hard.
I find friendships difficult because i don’t know what to talk about. Other boys talk about violent games which i am not allowed because it makes me more aggressive towards other people. I have played them before in front of my mum and she saw the slitting of throats and we got rid of it and my aggression improved. I try to keep up with the latest football scores but i find it boring to watch. Because i missed playing when i was younger Im just catching up and play instead of watching football like everyone else. It makes me calm when i play and i play in my room where no one can disturb me.
It makes me feel different and get special treatment at school which i don’t like having but i do like being different in a way because I’m not like everyone else.
It feels strange being with a adoptive family as they’re not your blood mum and dad.
Im glad I’m one on the lucky ones to have survived!
I get angry with Radio channels and posters (in my RS room) saying that ‘Neglected and abused children are more likely to commit crimes’ Which is in a way discriminatory. It isn’t our fault we were abused and neglected we had no choice as we were babies and couldn’t fight back. I will NEVER meet my birth mum or dad because i would lash out and get in trouble.
When i was abused i got a scar on my face and my teeth bent when a metal pole was forced into my mouth all i can remember was there was a lot of blood. I now get teased for all sorts the names are wild like ‘rabbit’ ‘beaver’ loads more!
Having a bad past has made my life hell as I’m teased.
I feel stronger everyday of speaking out about me being adopted, in my second primary school i bring in my birth story book and told everyone i was adopted then the teasing stopped but we were about to leave for secondary school. I have a favourite T.A which i cannot name for privacy which understands everything and i can go to her with my problems most of the time.
In the future i dream of becoming a police man to help other people with problems. The life at home is amazing because comparing it against my birth home it is amazing, my mum is a special breed as she is funny and odd some times as i write she is sat next to me making and elastic band ball and my dad is funny as well but but can we grumpy when he has had a bad day at work so we give him love
This week is about finding homes for children who are ‘hard to place’, which i don’t like because children who have been abused and neglected deserve to have safe and amazing families like mine.