(To be sung with a lilting reggae rythmn.)
Son he is my darling and my number one,
He came to me at three and a half.
He a big boy now, he is my lanky honeybun
But he still need me for a hug up and a laugh.
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, life goes on, yeah. La la la la life goes on.
In fact he need me very, very often,
He don’t like it when I’m not in play.
He need me to be close and to be present tense,
Every flippin’ minute of the day.
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, it goes on, yeah. La la la la it goes on.
I tell him there are times when I cannot talk,
In the toilet, on my bike, on the phone.
He just cannot take it, he just have to stalk
Me and then on and on and on and on he drone.
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, it goes on and on. La la la la on and on.
‘Son’ I say ‘I’m on the phone please wait a while,
I won’t be long I talkin’ to my mum.’
Son he just can’t bear it it just killin’ him,
And so he stand there he and shout ‘now mum just come’.
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, on and on and on. La la la la on and on.
‘Son I’m in the toilet I’ll be very quick.’
I’m hoping for a quiet piss in peace.
He stands outside the door and he shout and knock,
And when I finish he can’t tell me what it is.
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, bloody on and on. La la la la on and on.
‘Right I need a shower, are you happy here?’
‘Yes mum I am watching somethin’ fun.’
I get changed and stand under the water clear,
And then it starts up ‘Mummee, mum, mum, mum,’
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, on and on and on. La la la la on and on.
‘Let’s do something fun’ I say, ‘let’s read or cook,
Or maybe go outside and have a run’.
‘No that’s OK mummy I am far too bored.’
But he will sit just out of reach and holler ‘MUM!’
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, it goes on and on. La la la la on and on.
A friend she come for chat and a cup of tea.
Son he happy playin’ with a mate.
But soon as she come knockin’, he wants only me.
And he talk nonsense which I really, really hate.
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, it goes on and on. La la la la on and on.
Sometime he just ‘mummy mum mum mum’ me,
‘Mummy, mummy, mummy,’ all the day.
I used to dream that someone call me ‘mu-u-my’
But now I think just for a moment ‘go away’.
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, flippin’ on and on. La la la la on and on.
People tell me all kids like to do this stuff.
Tell me I don’t know what is right.
I am too polite to tell them they speak guff
And that their ‘expertise’ and them should take a hike.
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, it goes on and on.La la la la on and on.
So if you must say something preachy on a message board
‘All children do that’ don’t make any sense.
I love my boy and he my boy forever now
And I know he scared I’ll leave him like the rest
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, life goes on and on. La la la la life goes on.
Brilliant. Another one for AUK charity single of the year…along with your Sunscreen song.
You have described my son to a T, and I’ll bet you can sing it better than Mr McCartney did recently too!
Trust me, you don’t want to hear me sing this!
My oldest just like this. It’s as if he’s constantly tugging at my sleeve. Questions, questions, questions and chatter chatter chatter as if to say “if I stop talking you might forget I’m here”. Can be very intense and extremely draining at times. Bless him.
Yes I try and remind myself it’s ‘don’t forget me’ behaviour. Thanks for commenting.
LMAO!! This is brilliant and describes Katie to a “T”! I chuckled at the bit when you said ” I used to dream that someone call me ‘mu-u-my’
But now I think just for a moment ‘go away’.” I’ve often said “You can go off a word you know!” Katie has constant verbal diarrhea from the moment she wakes up until the moment she gives in to sleep. I relate to your whole song LOL
Wow, Barlow eat your heart out! Terrific poetry, and great way of describing your experience, I expect to be digging this out on several occasions!
To be fair Barlow did help me out a bit, particularly with the chorus.
Brilliant LMAO. So funny. You’re pure genius.
This just descrbes my son to an absolute T
Thank you